Pig Pen Disaster
by MICKEY.G.B
Summary: Merlin is sent to pick up Gwaine from the tavern while Morgana and Gwen are in the marketplace shopping, but what happens when the four collide? Set in The Lost Prince universe but can be read by itself. Paring is Mergana.


**Hi everyone this is a one shot set before The Lost Prince explaining what happened that day at the tavern that Morgana has been complaining to Merlin about. As always review and tell me if you spot any mistakes so I can fix them, enjoy. **

Pig Pen Disaster

"MERLIN!" Arthur shouted at the top of his lungs. Merlin quickly rushed into the king's dining room and saw Arthur staring at his plate in disgust. Arthur turned to face him, "What do you call this then?" Arthur's tone was a mix of sarcasm and anger.

Merlin moved towards the king carefully, half expecting a cup to be projected towards his head. "It's called lunch Sire. It's usually the second meal of the day. First comes breakfast then comes lunch but seeing how much you eat I would be your," Merlin began to count with his fingers remembering how many meals he had brought Arthur this particular day. "Your 5th meal I believe."

Arthur stood from his seat causing the wood to scrape across the floor, "You think this is funny Merlin?" Arthur's face was turning redder by the second.

"No Sire. I don't see what the problem is." Arthur walked to Merlin and pulled him towards his plate almost shoving the food in his face. He picked up an apple and handed it to Merlin.

"Tell me, what do you see?"

Merlin stared at the apple and noticed nothing out of order, "This sire I do believe is called an apple. Most people put it in their mouth and begin to chew-"

Arthur lifted his hand and wacked Merlin on the back of the head causing Merlin to flinch in pain. "You think this is funny Merlin. This apple has dirt on it. How can you possibly expect me to eat it?" Arthur looked at Merlin whose face was one of pain and astonishment. Merlin inspected the apple again and began removing the _'dirt'_ with the hem of his tunic and placed the fruit back on Arthur's plate.

"There sire, now there is no more dirt on your apple." Merlin began walking away to complete more of his chores at the same time Arthur picked up his cup and threw it at Merlin's head which hit him dead set in the middle. Merlin turned back so he was facing Arthur rubbing his head. Arthur's face was plastered with a cocky smirk and his eyes were sparkling with mischief. "What was that for you prat. That's going to leave a bump."

"There's more where that came from." He picked up another cup and was about to throw it when a knock at the door sounded, "Enter" Arthur grumbled.

Sir Leon emerged from behind the wooden doors a distressful look shown on his features. "Arr Leon what can I do for you?" Leon moved from the door nodding at Merlin as he passed and walked towards Arthur.

"Sire, one of the innkeepers has informed me that Sir Gwaine has been drinking at the tavern all night and has yet to leave. He also told me that Gwaine did not pay for the drinks he ordered."

Arthur shook his head and turned to face Merlin, "Go find him will you and bring him to me once you do." Merlin nodded at both Leon and Arthur and left without saying another word.

The tavern was empty during midday so it would be relatively easy to find Gwaine and bring him home; or so Merlin thought. As he entered the tavern he gestured towards the bar tender asking if he had seen Gwaine. The tender snorted in reply, "I just threw him out of here not too long ago, didn't have enough money on him to pay for all the mead he ordered." Merlin thanked the man and turned to leave.

Walking outside he turned to his right and noticed that the pigs were all gathered around something. Merlin curiously walked towards the pen and noticed a long object lying face down in the mud and pig waste. Merlin shook his head noticing the figure and moved closer towards it. "Gwaine, Gwaine you have to wake up." The figure wouldn't move.

Merlin groaned and moved to open the pen gate. On his first step he heard a slushing sound and looked down to see his boots and trousers covered in mud and poo. "The things I do for you," he mumbled and began to walk towards the knight. Upon reaching him he bent down and began to shake him. "Gwaine, come on Gwaine you're surrounded in shit." The knight rolled so that he was lying on his back and began to open his eyes.

"Oh, hey Merlin." Gwaine grumbled closing his eyes again.

"Hey Merlin, hey Merlin that's all you have to say for yourself. How did you even end up in here Gwaine?" Merlin looked at his friend in pity and Gwaine began to tell his tale.

"Well last night I met this lovely woman at the tavern and I bought her some drinks. One thing led to another and before I knew it I had no more money left so I got thrown out and decided to go for a little walk; and that my friend is the last thing I remember." Merlin shook his head and made to lift Gwaine up by his arm when Gwaine pulled away from his grip, "Merlin what am I doing lying in a pig pen?"

"What are you talking about Gwaine you were drunk and you must have fallen unconscious. This is how I found you not moments ago." Gwaine sat upright and frowned at Merlin.

"No, no I was having a conversation with a beautiful woman. The next thing I see is you hovering above me." Merlin shook his head and stepped over a sleeping pig and opened the gate. He turned back to see Gwaine standing. All his clothes were covered in brown slop and Merlin couldn't help but laugh at the state of his friend. Gwaine noticing this questioned Merlin, "What? Do I have something on my face?"

Merlin just laughed harder, "More like all over."

Gwaine shook his head a smirk forming at the corners of his lips, "Let's see how you like it then." With that Gwaine bent down and began forming a ball of mud and poo in his hands and through it at Merlin. The ball hit him square in the face. The excess trailed down his top covering him in poo.

Merlin whipped the stink out of his eyes and once his vision was clear of brown he noticed Gwaine howling in laughter. "So this is what I get for trying to help out a friend." Gwaine continued to laugh failing to notice Merlin creating his own ball of brown which hit Gwaine at the tip of his head.

Gwaine stopped laughing and saw a smirking Merlin and began to create a new ball, "And so it begins."

"Come Gwen it will be fun. When was the last time you went shopping?" Morgana and a reluctant Gwen were walking around the market browsing at the newly imported fabric and jewellery on sale.

"Please Morgana, you know that being queen has taken too much of my time. This is the first time in months that I have been down here."

"Well then all the more reason to come." Gwen nodded and Morgana dragged her towards a stall filled with the finest fabrics. Gwen picked up a beautiful green velvet and turned towards Morgana who was holding a very revealing and almost transparent undergarment. "A little revealing don't you think Morgana."

Morgana turned to face Gwen a mischievous smile gracing her lips, "All the more reason to buy it."

"Merlin is a very lucky man." Gwen smiled.

"It is his birthday soon. I do believe he deserves something special, don't you think." Gwen shook her head while Morgana bought the clothing and they continued walking. "What about you and Arthur, surely my brother was happy with the present you gave him for his birthday." Gwen turned a deep shade of red and was about to say something when Morgana spoke, "What's happening over there?"

Gwen followed her line of sight and noticed a large crowd gathered by the tavern. "I'm not sure but whatever it is it doesn't look good." Gwen and Morgana made their way towards the crowd and couldn't believe what they saw.

By this point Merlin and Gwaine were covered in mud, poo and any other discussing, stinking object that was in the pen. Gwaine through a ball and it hit Merlin just underneath his heart. Merlin laughed and began to create the perfect weapon. "Sorry Gwaine but I win this time." Merlin through the poo directly at Gwaine but instead of hitting him in the face, Gwaine dodged and the poo went flying into the crowd and hit a woman directly in the face.

Merlin hadn't noticed the crowd that had gathered to watch the fight until he heard the everyone gasp in shock and Morgana's ear piercing scream.

"MERLIN!" Morgana screamed. "This better not be what I think this is!"

Merlin's face turned into one of shock horror and quickly ran to Morgana but Gwaine stuck his foot out causing Merlin to trip and resulted in more mud splattering onto Morgana's dress.

"Morgana I am so so sorry I didn't mean to, I didn't know that you were even in the market, I-" Morgana cut him off rage clearly shone on her face and the tone in her voice was not one to be messed with.

"I don't need to tell you everything I do and you didn't answer my question! Is this what I think it is because if it is I will… kill… you!" Morgana eyes were filled with anger and Merlin knew that he was a dead man as he nodded his head. Again the curdling scream pierced through Camelot.

"Don't even think about coming to my chambers tonight or else!" Morgana yelled and swiftly turned marching back to her chambers to clean herself. Merlin jumped over the fence and ran trying to catch Morgana.

"This is your entire fault Gwaine!" Merlin yelled bolting after the extremely angry Lady of Camelot.

Gwaine was still watching as Merlin sprinted down the market and towards Morgana and was also witness to the slap that was delivered to Merlin's face. Gwaine winced in pain at the sight knowing that that would kill and would leave a mark.

Gwen marched towards Gwaine and began berating him, "I hope you're happy with yourself Gwaine." Gwaine bowed his head in shame, "Arthur ordered Merlin to come and find you 10 minutes ago and now you will have gotten him in trouble with both Arthur and Morgana."

Gwaine was feeling guiltier by the second and Gwen noticed, "It was a good shot though. I never knew Merlin had it in him." Gwaine's head shot up at hearing that and at Gwen's smile he began to grin. "That doesn't mean you're off the hook. Go clean yourself up then go find Arthur. Tell him that I have given Merlin the rest of the day off. After that I want you to apologise to both Merlin and Morgana. Do you understand?"

Gwaine nodded and bowed to his queen, "Yes my lady." With that Gwaine left to go follow his orders. Gwen was still standing there watching them leave a smile forming at her lips. Wait till Arthur hears about this.

Gwen was walking to towards her and Arthur's chambers to find a freshly dressed Gwaine exiting them. He bowed to his queen and continued walking down the hall towards Gaius' chambers. Gwen smiled and opened the doors to see Arthur sitting at his desk head in his heads.

Upon seeing Gwen he immediately stood and walked towards her enveloping her in a loving hug. "What am I going to do with them?" Arthur breathed into her neck.

Gwen smiled, "Which one Merlin, Gwaine or Morgana?"

"All of them. Wait what does Morgana have to do with this?" Arthur practically whined.

"What did Gwaine tell you exactly?"

"That he ignited a fight with Merlin and that was why it took so long for him to come here and that none of it was Merlin's fault all his own. He also said that you gave Merlin the rest of the day off. Guinevere why is that."

Gwen smiled and sat Arthur down on the bed. "Let me tell you the whole story…"

**(10 Minutes Later) **

Arthur was on the verge of tears from all the laughter, "Merlin is a dead man."


End file.
